A recent interview with a “sex education expert” advocating that parents should ask their baby for permission before they change its diaper, has had over 12 million views. I’ve watched it, multiple times, mostly out of disbelief, and I believe that this assumption must be addressed. It’s wrong! Do not give it any credibility!
The idea of protecting children from sexual abuse by establishing a “culture of consent” whereby infants have the right to decide what happens to their bodies, is sheer lunacy. And in fact, just the opposite can be expected. In reality, by asking a baby or a toddler for permission to change their “nappy” and then changing it whether they want you to or not, is teaching them that protesting is futile. So what happens when they are older and someone presses them for inappropriate touch? We’ve already groomed them to believe:
- Adults are dishonest. Even though they ask you for permission, they don’t mean it.
- Saying “no” doesn’t amount to anything, so don’t bother.
A parent has to change a diaper whether the baby likes it or not, because it is in the best interest of the child. That is what parenting is all about. We must care for children until they are able to care for themselves. Parents have authority over children; children do not have authority over their parents. But for the past few decades, that authority has been seriously undermined. Today’s parents are being given all the responsibility for their children but incrementally stripped of their authority to parent in a responsible, moral way.
This isn’t the first time that so called “experts” have undermined the family. Dr. Spock, hailed in the 1940s and 50s as the pioneer of the new kinder, gentler approach to child-rearing, admitted decades later that his progressive ideas “contributed to an increase of permissive parenting in America.”
When it comes to parenting, you are the expert. Go with your gut! And if you need some corroboration, read Reb Bradley’s book, “Child Training Tips.”
Vicki and her husband Terry are the parents of eight children and were named Colorado Parents of the Year and Family of the Year, 2001. Vicki is the author of two books, many articles, former talk show host, and has appeared on numerous television and radio programs. To get your parenting questions answered, write to Vicki at firstname.lastname@example.org.